Friday, April 07, 2006

"I've lost my mffwffle"

So I went on a Bart hunt yesterday. I thought I'd hit the obvious places first, you know to cross them off my list? So the grand boutiques of Target (Tar-jei) and Toyz R Us are taken care of. No Simpsonia in either place, though did you know Target sells Australian wine? Yeah, it's right next to their wine in a cube...No Bart though....This necessitated a trip to "THE MALL" and of course a bit of wandering like a dufuss in the city.

Being the new-kid-on-the-block and not having lived in a "big city" for 14 years, it was an interesting thing to have older folk whizzing by on either side of me. I felt as if I was on a slower RPM than everyone else. Kinda like some of those kitsch commercials or scenes in movies where the world is passing the main character by...

Given my "unique" POV, I was able to people watch and catch something rather interesting. Before I begin I should thank Ronald Reagan once again for giving me this form of entertainment. Had he NOT closed all those mental wards and hospitals, I'd have missed the following:

At the toy place, the big red dot, Macy's, and Gott-I always spell this store incorrectly, Gottschalks?, the same incident played itself out. I had to double check to make sure I wasn't seeing quadruple.

A, (as my dad would say, and you gotta stress the Mexican accent when you read it) "home lace" person (2 were definitely female, the others were that weird "could be either") comes up to a cashier/worker, "HEY, hey, I need, I've lost my mffwffle." (Seriously, it begins as a yell and then ends up a whisper that I could not decipher.)

Cashier/worker is barely 18 and this is a mall and why are these people in this store!?!? Smiles and says, "Let me get my manager."

The manager, what 21? (no, not true, the toy store manager did have some gray in his hair...but he'd also looked at me funny when I asked about Bart, so I want to be mean to him too), comes over and asks, "How can I help here."

"I NEED, I've lost my mffwffle."

The manager smiles and turns to cashier/worker and says, "Get/take them to Lost and Found."

I dunno what happened at the fancy big department stores after they lead them away to deal with lost and found, but at the other two places they got a chair to sit in and wait for the box or bag to be brought to them. The "home lace" then with a leisurely pace learned in the mental ward, looks through the box/bag until they slowly shake their heads and say, "NOPE, not here."

But did I see them pocket something? I dunno, I might be making that part up.

But I know I'm not making up the fact that I saw this repeated FOUR times as I meandered through the mall at a snail's pace, looking for that elusive plush Bart Simpson doll. (And mom said that a 12" one would fit the bill if I couldn't find anything bigger!!! Oh for a "Hot Topic" or a "Spencer's Gifts"--neither exist at Northgate Mall. I must expand the search radius.)


Rebekah said...

This is probably a stupid question, but have you checked the internet? You can find just about anything on the internet. Although I did a quick search and only came up with the 10".

Tactless Wonder said...

I may have found a 15" Bart, but I kinda wanted to look at it first, see if it passed my 3-yr-old requirements