Thursday, June 12, 2008

When I was 1 and 20...a Wise Man Said to Me...

Actually I don't know how old I was or remember if the person was male...or wise.

I just remember what they said...but not verbatim, of course, cuz that would require all those brain cells I killed in college, or my mom's memory, which I never had...

Forgotten person and I were talking about friends and friendships and they said that you get to a point in your life where the most important thing to you is finding a place to call Home, and seeking out and/or reconnecting with childhood friends. It's like a kind of taking stock of your life.

It seemed rather odd to me then, a person who was STILL friends with their "childhood" friends. Suzanna, were you there? Was it one of the OLG teachers?


At 34, I can count on one finger the person I still keep in touch with prior to 8th grade graduation days... High School? Let's not go there, that subject is still a bit painful and raw. College? Counting Grad School and friends outside of classes that I made? I can come up with a handful, tops.

Where did they go, George? Where did they go?

Combine that with my J. Alfred Prufrock moods (I grow old ... I grow old ... I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled), and I am jumping at the chance to help out a friend to check out one of those websites where you might find old acquaintances.

So I've found six people from my decades of yore. But now the I actually contact them?

Reaching out to people I used to know? It's asking a lot from my inside self that would rather sit in her room and knit and read and not go out and mingle with the outside world. I am a hermit at heart. Posting my stuff for other people to see is a whole different universe than addressing an individual. Even electronically. I mean, what do you say?! How do you start?
Hi, we used to be friends then I fell off the planet and now I'm back again, a dozen (yipes) years later, how are you?
The best part of friends that knew you "back when?" We use to be able to just pick up where we left off...No big ole' fill-in-the-blanks. But that was when a couple months - a year tops - went by. It's easy to summarize a year in a couple of sentences.

12 though? Urrr...

There was one site I almost joined because my very first crush's name was in the list of people I might know. Can you imagine that one?
Hi cool guy I used to know and last saw 20 years ago before I had boobs or hips or could control my obvious fascination of you as I stared and stared at you from behind my those dorky glasses and oh yeah, braces! Then there were the bangs! You got to see them through their entire evolution! From the days they were worn short--that would be back before Betty Paige became popular...heh heh, you know, when we just called them Mr. Spock bangs -- to those wretched teen years I was a victim of BIG POOFY East LA BANGS! Yeah! THAT girl.
I am almost old enough to be able to do that. I mean, do you remember that "My So Called Life" episode where the mom was supposed to meet up with an old boyfriend and the anticipation and the worry and the "am I cool enough" and I am so old and then he can't make it cuz he has the snuffles or something? Cuz I might be 15 pounds heavier than I'd like to be, but he could be balding with a beer gut and 10 kids.

And HOW SAD is it that when I watched those few reruns on (no longer there for me to link to, sniff) I empathized with THE MOM!!! "Do I dare to eat a peach!"

Sigh. It has been a long week. Happy almost Friday!


Bezzie said...

Eh contact, them, what's the worse they do? Ignore you? Then you're back where you started. Nothing lost.

Olga said...

Oh the pain, the pain.
I hate going back to NM to see my mom 'cuz I have this fear I'll run into someone I knew 'back in the day' and now I'll be all, "oh,My goodness! Yes I do remember you! I'm old and fat and grey!!Pretend I'm still 18, heh heh. and oh yeah, I do have a PHD from Harvard and work in a secret goverment lab , How about you?" Then one of my rug rats will run up all whiney and demand candy or something.

Suzanna said...

I couldn't vouch for where/when you might've heard that piece of "advice" but I do remember that one of the OLG teachers said that the only lifelong friends we'll make are the ones you make in college. How disappointing to hear for 7th/8th graders with their friends in tow.