Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Mary, Destroyer of Keyboards...

The reality is I've got nothing.  Okay that is a GIGANTIC lie.  Let's just say I have nothing I am ready to expound about at this very moment as my life is now ridiculously so full that I am wondering when exactly I'm supposed to be able to breathe.

However, I'm going to use the excuse of YET ANOTHER KEYBOARD to write something up as I try my very hardest to get used to where all the keys are.

Does anyone else remember the standardization of keyboards?  Or was that just me + manual typewriters?  And then there were the slew of IBM Selectrics - or whatever they were called.  But all the keys were uniform!  Damnit! Somewhere along the way someone came up with the word ergonomic and everything went to pieces.  Or rather, keyboards did.  And just like my Kroger brand sugar jumping on the 4lb bag bandwagon -- I am not the only one to notice this right?  Sugar?  Used to come in 5 and 10 lb bags.  All of a sudden C & H is all about 4lb bags.  So screw it!  I went generic and bought 5lb bags at the same 4lb price.  Except yesterday?  I guess they finally ran out of the old bags...so now I get to buy 4 lbs of sugar for 5 lb prices.  This is almost as irritating as reading my baby brother's FB posts wherein he butchers the English language...

ANYWAY...They ran out of "new" keyboards in the IT dept., so I was asked to use an old-style not-quite-the big-white-one-with-the-clickety-keys, but slightly twisty with the bigger T Y G H B N keys...you know the style?  Which would work if I typed the way Ms. Miller wanted me to with the left hand on the "left side" keys and the right hand on the "right side" keys...but I don't.  I space bar with the wrong finger and it's my right hand that reaches across into left hand territory for my B's.  Which means I'm going to have strained tendons if I'm not careful.

Oh the fun times I have at work.  And if you're still reading?  Bless you.  You're sweet.

This is my third keyboard in as many months.  I'd think that would give someone a clue that maybe the ones they are giving us are poopie.  Or I'm being labeled as the destroyer of all things lettered...which would work except for the fact that the last one I handed to them I'd busted the number pad thingie...I am talented, oh yeah.

So Andy and I have been watching the "Vampire Diaries" on Netflix.  I know, this means I am less to you than before, bear with me.  It's a lark and a laugh and who else would watch that show with him if not me?  We do a lot of this, watching TV shows that no one else would watch, together.  It's a thing.  But seriously?  Is it really only Joss Whedon who put it out there that 100+ year old vampires shouldn't get together with 17 yr olds?  Cuz really, what do you have in common?

In college I remember having a conversation with my best friend, about certain connections that are absolutely necessary to have a good relationship.  And how we all have a "marker."  That one thing/rule/connection/whatever you want to call it, that tells you, yes, I can be with this person.  Some people aren't all that creative, they verify you were not born in the 90s and you're cool.  For others?  And here is where my point is coming in, they need a shared history, even if it's just by proxy.  The fellow we were talking about would find a way to work in the phrase, "Conjunction Junction" into the conversation.  If the beauty he was charming was not able to to fill in the blank (i.e. "What's your function,") it was game over, man.

18 years later, I'm still thinking about this as I watch Damon and Stephan Salvatore try to get it on with a 17 yr old CHILD.  Why do I keep watching?  It's kinda like a train wreck I guess.  I just can't not look!  But this is the same me who has now watched all of the original Star Trek, Enterprise, and maybe as much Miss Marple as can find its way onto Netflix.  I am not proud...

Okay, I'm going to go try to use this keyboard on actual data entry now.  Thank you for indulging me.

1 comment:

Beth said...

Destroying keyboards is your super power! :) I watched some Miss Marple episodes the other day and I really enjoyed them.