#1 THOU SHALT NOT SMOKE WHILE READING LIBRARY BOOKS!
That's a biggie with me right now. I am POOR people, I don't buy books, I check them out of the library. Some nimnod decided he would pollute a library book by sharing his icky stench, which I'll describe as "4 year old unwashed denim style smoking jacket smell." If you don't know that smell first hand, I'm sure you can imagine it.
I'm returning Wigfield by Amy (yes David's sister) Sedaris, Paul Dinello, and Stephen (of the Colbert Report) Colbert, unread and barely opened. I was rather pissed after getting all ready to spend my evening reading when gross, bleck...that smell. I'm no angel. I've known the pleasure of a cancer stick in my day (when did I become my own granma and start using phrases like "in my day???"), BUT NOT WHILE READING SOMEONE ELSE'S BOOKS! That's just wrong. Even if the "someone else" is the library, HELLO! Maybe someone else wants to enjoy being literate too???? Ugh.
And if any of my younger family members ever stumble onto this blog? Do as I say and not as I did: DO NOT START SMOKING. IT IS A BITCH TO QUIT. And yes, I just used the B-word. No you may not repeat that either.
#2 What is wrong with people and their ability to scratch up CDs so very thoroughly?
I guess this is a library materials post... I've had a run of bad luck with the audio books of late. Usually the last third of the books is LOST due to the excessive scratches and JUNK on the CDs. What are these people doing? Brillo-pad cleaning is NOT necessary! I really miss that super-spiffy CD cleaner at the Kings Beach Library.
Yeah, I'm becoming kinda nostalgic about my time in Kings Beach. Probably because well, even if you didn't want them to, everybody did know who you were. I feel kinda lost in this big city. Anonymous. I have yet to have the same checker twice at the grocery store. No one has time to shoot the breeze cuz they have to deal with the ten thousand people behind me. Sometimes I feel like I'm just a social security number on a file somewhere.
"I AM NOT A NUMBER!" -The Prisoner
With that I must leave you. I'm gonna go apply for my Washington State Driver's License, and yeah, you get to take a number right at the door. You know I haven't had to do that ANYWHERE I've lived in...well...since I got my driver's license when I was 18 or so??? That would also be the year I left LA...hmmm seems I might have some things to ponder.
If the sun ever comes out again I will post a picture of my progress with my green/blue/brown?/grey-black? sock. YES PEOPLE! I do indeed have 2 Energizer Lithium E2s sitting/lying right in front of me :). I might even accomplish the changing of the batteries as I watch this post update my blog!!! With that I leave you with the email Richard sent me this morning, dedicated to all UC graduates:
How many UC students does it take to change a light bulb?
UCLA: Two. 1 to change the bulb, and another to call their friends at USC and tell them how they changed it just as well and for much cheaper.
CAL: Three. 1 to change the bulb and two to debate about the metaphysical state of the bulb and how its invention has impacted human development.
UCSD: Five. 1 to hold the bulb and 4 to start smoking weed until the room spins.
UCI: Eleven. 1 to change the bulb and ten to sit around watching because honestly, what else is there to do at Irvine past 10pm??
UCR: Three. 1 to steal the bulb, another to drive the getaway car, and the
last to call all his friends to throw the celebration party on a Tuesday night.
UCSB: Seven. 1 to screw the bulb and 6 to screw each other.
UC Davis: Zero. There is no electricity in Davis.
UC Merced: Two. One to hold the bulb while the other calls his friend asking for help in figuring out this "new college thing."
UCSC: None. Living in the forest, they see at night by torches and moonlight - damn hippies
3 comments:
Ewwwwwwww. I can't imagine a smelly library bookj. that's awful. I'm going to pass along that UC joke to several people in my office :)
That is absolutely horid about the library book. I can't believe the level of disgust some people can take it to, I know it could have been worse, but still it's a library, they struggles as it is, people shouldn't ruin their books.
For someone who is having a hard time writing, you do have a lot of content. I was stuck blogging about Madonna. Yikes.
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