Reverse Discrimination

(ETA: Sorry English teacher habits die hard...edited for grammar & flow.)

I had a project spectrum update, but sometimes other things come up that I'd rather share.
This morning I was sent this "chain" email:

A Mexican man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only Mexican man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him. The white man said, "colored people are not allowed here." The Mexican man turned around and stood up.
He then said: "Listen Pendejo....

when I was born, I was BROWN"
"When I grew up, I was BROWN,"
"When I'm sick, I'm BROWN,"
"When I go in the sun, I'm BROWN,"
"When I'm cold, I'm BROWN"
"When I die, I'll be BROWN"
But you pendejo...."
"When you're born, you're pink"
"When you grow up, you're white"
"When you're sick, you're green"
"When you go out in the sun, you turn red"
"When you're cold, you turn blue"
"When you die, you turn purple"
"And you have the nerve to call me colored?"
"Chinga tu madre, puto"

If you're a real beaner pass this on to 8 trueMexicans you know... keep the brown pride!!

As I pointed out to the sender, um, in his "to" field, he'd pretty much used up my list, even if I'd wanted to send this around. 8 "true" Mexicans? Brother, then I'm not even a part of that list...

I've mentioned this before, I am so pale I glow in the dark. My hair is not dark brown/black nor straight. My eyes aren't even all that dark of a brown, and they turn green when I'm not even aware of it. None of it comes from a bottle or due to contacts, thank you very much, I'm vain, but too much of a tomboy to go that far.

Happily, I did not have to appease the "chain mail" gremlins, I was exonerated about 14 years ago (yes, I've been on the internets for OVER 14 years, talk about feelin' OLD) by a helpful fellow that sent around "the last chain email ever." I think it's somewhere on the nets. So I can read this email and not worry about gremlin retribution.

Instead, I replied with a couple of stories which I thought I'd share here:

When I was in college a housemate of mine, wanted to take "Spanish for Spanish Speakers" (a class for native Spanish speakers) so very bad. You see, she'd done all the Spanish UCSC had and wanted more. So I sat down with her (dark-skinned Italian girl that she was) and we wrote out her fake Mexican "history" stating where her "family" came from, etc. using mine as the base.

So she gets in the class.

The class had "mixers" and her turn comes up.

I meet the class and they are a bunch of pendejas and pendejos themselves. All full of themselves and theirMexican PRIDE (in the sense of the SIN of pride) and they were talking smack about my other housemate (my maid of honor years later, white, blonde, pretty) and I in Spanish. My other friend, who was also in the class, asked me to please please please not say anything. You all know how I am :). My other housemate had gone upstairs.

"Pinches pretendidos, estan en mi casa y ni saben quien soy. Hablen lo que hablen, que se lo tragen todo." (I learned that little bit from my dad's people. Basically it means that whatever evil they speak or do, may it get swallowed into them and they experience it/do it/get it, etc..

The room was silent as they realized their faux pas. (Hee hee, I can be tri-lingual see :) ) Not only was I "one of them," I was from "el rancho," and possibly (cuz I do sound rather authentic when I swear) born there. I left shortly thereafter to go off on them to my then boyfriend. The night ended pretty soon after that I'm told, and like most Mexicans in these situations, (and I know this is gonna sound pretty bad but unfortunately it's true,) there were no apologies.

I am sorry I'm so pale I pass. Who can I apologize to? But that's no excuse for us being evil in places where we shouldn't. Just like it's no excuse for others to be prejudice against us. What fun it is to be told about, "fuckin beaners who are campin' on my land! Who come to this country to take my jobs away," from a man who helped raise my Xhusband, at a Thanksgiving Dinner? Lord we thank you for this bountiful feast....I was in HIS house, so I kept my trap shut. I do have some survival instincts after all. Even after he went off and said, "all that those beaners do is come into the country and apply for medical and social security and bleed this country dry. Evryoneadem's been on unemployment or some kind of social help." I could have popped my top...I knew my X had been on food stamps, and he's white, but I KNEW KNEW KNEW that my family never had.

Or the time in college when I was denied a place in a class because of my name. "No, this is for newcomers or 1st Generation. You're obviously not." I told off that professor, yes, in college. I'm lucky I went to a public university that approved of students having their own voices... But how dare she base it all on a name? ('member, I'm named after an IRISH nun that my mom loved loved loved.) And yes, I told her off in Spanish. I think I called her a puta too, it was just too much for me by then (I was a senior, I had a couple quarters until graduation, I didn't have much to lose.

And people still wondered why oh why I didn't participate in the "Latin graduation" or whatever they called the ceremony. Great, let me be a part of a group that looks at me funny when I say I belong. Who knew you needed to carry around credentials to prove yourself? Especially when the family you've been around most of your life does come in every color of the rainbow and they're all Mexican?

Bitter much? May-be. Okay, yes. But if I'm gonna be discriminated against a group, why does it have to be the one I grew up in?

Okay, must go pack, we pick up the moving truck on Wednesday so this is really hittin' home now.